While it may seem counterintuitive to say so, often times when we as adults “help” the child, we are actually robbing him of the opportunity to grow. Real growth comes from real experience, not simply watching someone else do something. I cannot learn to tie my own shoes by simply watching you tie yours.

In the Montessori environment, children are given the opportunity for real life experiences on a daily basis to practice the skills they need to develop independence. In fact, there is an entire component of the Montessori curriculum devoted to the acquisition of these specific skill sets called “Practical Life”. The purpose of the Practical Life materials and exercises is to help the child develop a sense of order, coordination, concentration, and independence. In this area of the classroom, children have many open-ended activities available to them throughout the day. These activities would include: pouring grains of rice or water from one vessel to another, using tongs/tweezers/spoon to transfer a wet or dry medium from one dish to another, folding socks, using clothes pins, stringing beads, even sewing! There are wooden frames that allow a child to practice using a zipper, fastening buckles/snaps/Velcro, buttoning traditional buttons and tying shoelaces. One of my favorite components of the Practical Life curriculum is that the child may repeat the activity as long as he has the desire to do so. The ability to have open-ended practice is why Montessori children achieve independence so quickly.

The children then get to practice these skills in the “real world” of the classroom by: serving themselves snack (pouring juice or milk and using tongs or a spoon to serve the food portion), putting on their own jackets and zipping them up, putting on their own socks and shoes after napping, and folding up their nap bedding. Because the Montessori environment operates at “child speed” vs. “adult speed”, a child can spend 20 minutes putting on his shoes without being rushed or having an adult swoop in and complete the task for him. The satisfaction a child gets from mastering a new skill is priceless!

“Any child who is self-sufficient, who can tie his shoes, dress or undress himself, reflects in his joy and sense of achievement the image of human dignity, which is derived from a sense of independence.” – Maria Montessori

In addition to directly preparing the child to care for some of his own needs, the Practical Life materials indirectly help prepare the child for his academic journey in the Montessori classroom. The hand strength and coordination that the child gains from manipulating the tools in the Practical Life activities prepare him for the job of holding a pencil. The concentration, control and sense of order needed to complete the Practical Life exercises help prepare him to use more complicated and time consuming Montessori apparatuses in other curriculum areas of the classroom. The independence the child gains from successfully completing the Practical Life activities gives him the confidence to attempt more challenging work.

If you would like to incorporate some Practical Life activities into your home life, here are some suggestions:

Dry rice or water to pour from one small cup to another

Dry pasta, two bowls and a small spoon as a transfer activity (the child using the spoon or his hand to move the pasta from one bowl to the other)

Tongs to pick up pom-poms or small dry beans to move from one vessel to another

A rolling pin and play dough (or real dough) with cookie cutters

A small basket with clothespins so the child can clip the pins around the edge of the basket

A dishwashing sink or basin with soap, a sponge or scrub brush

A basket of loose socks for the child to sort and fold

A small washbasin, soap and brush with objects to be scrubbed (sea shells, or the child’s own toys work well)

It is important to remember that these activities will not be spill proof or mess free! Include a small broom, dustbin, and mop or towels in your at-home Practical Life activity zone. Cleaning up after oneself is also part of the Practical Life curriculum! In fact, children quite enjoy sweeping and cleaning, and can often be found doing so in the Montessori environment.  Enjoy watching your child gain independence and confidence through the practice and repetition of these activities.

The purpose of the Practical Life materials is to allow the child the time to learn the skill sets that each activity is designed to address, but also to help the child develop the hand strength and control needed for handwriting. Children will demonstrate both of these skill sets in the classroom when they serve snack to themselves and others, when they clean tables after lunch, sweep up after a spill, and of course when they begin to work on their handwriting by recording their work.

To give children some continuity of experience, I often suggest that parents incorporate some Practical Life opportunities in the home. (My son’s favorite activity at 2 years old was dish washing!)
I also recommend giving children the chance to help out around the house by doing some age-appropriate chores. Children genuinely enjoy contributing to the family, and teaching them these skills early helps to foster independence and responsibility. It may take a lot of practice, but eventually your child can be a partner in keeping your home clean and helping out the other members of the family.

Here are some examples of age appropriate chores for children:

Toddler:
Put dirty laundry in hamper
Bring diapers/wipes
Wipe table with cloth
Assist with hand washing
Assist with putting away toys/books

Age 2-3:
Put dirty laundry in hamper
Tidy up toys/books
Fold face cloths/tea towels
Set table
Throw away trash
Bring diapers/wipes
Dust baseboards
Begin to dress themselves
Put on socks/hats independently
Sweep floors

Age 4-5:
Water plants (inside and outside)
Make bed
Feed pets
Tidy bedroom
Prepare simple snacks
Wash/dry dishes
Clear table
Wipe up spills
Fold socks/put away laundry
Dress themselves
Vacuuming (hand held)
Put on socks and shoes independently

Keep in mind, every child is different, and may require different levels of assistance/guidance. Here are some guidelines:

1. Give details. Explain what the chore entails, and what materials the child will need to perform it. A child has no frame of reference when you say, “Just dust the baseboards!” You must explain what the baseboards are, and that a damp cloth and some water will be needed to complete the task. Show them which rooms you would like them to clean.
2. Be patient. It will take your child a lot longer to perform these tasks than it would take for a grown up to do them. Make sure to give an appropriate amount of time for the job so you are not rushing the child.
3. Be mindful of language. I find that the way I present a chore makes a big difference in the child’s willingness to participate. I might say, “Wow! You are 3 years old now, and that means you get to help me set the table! How many plates will we need?” Imagine if I used the word “had” instead of “get”. The child would hear, “You are 3 years old and you have to help me set the table.” It sounds a lot different, and will be received very differently. If you present these chores as opportunities to learn something new, or to use a new tool, children are generally eager to participate.
4. Be consistent. Once you have found a few chores that are developmentally appropriate for your child, start a chore schedule. (eg. Daily chores: set the table and make your bed. Weekly chores: tidy bedroom and help fold laundry on Saturday.)
5. Show gratitude. Give your child genuine thanks for contributing to the household, and congratulate them on a job well done!

I am a firm believer in helping children to develop the skills they will need to become functional young adults. Both the Montessori environment and the home are the perfect places to support this progress towards independence.